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Couple sues Chinese subway for leaking video of them hugging and kissing to YouTube. Yes, Chinese... not American. Big Brother isn't just invading OUR privacy. It's invading the privacy of Chinese public places... as in, there is none. Do these people even know what "public" means? It's the P in PDA, as in "Take your PDA outside!" Next, they'll be suing the judge who stole their pants.

Chinese nightclub hostess films her boyfriend killing one of her former patrons. Now THAT'S an invasion of privacy... and a great way to negate the utility of having cut the body into tiny pieces to obscure his identity. Now we have a "rewind" button. "Look, he's putting the dead guy back together!"

Another article on Internet plagiarism. Honestly, I see so many of these that I begin to think they're just cutting and pasting from other articles.

The Russian government offers to pay for damage when one of its missiles hits a house. In former Soviet Russia, it didn't matter because it was the government's house to begin with.

Gas station clerk busted for selling cheap gas to friends and family. She left the receipts for the owner. SHE LEFT THE RECEIPTS FOR THE OWNER. And she didn't think he'd notice? Granted, it took him a few months...

Crook returns most of what he stole, except for a GPS. Probably just needed to figure out which of the items would make the best Christmas present and decided not to make the decision while in the house, but to take all the options with him and return the ones he didn't need afterward.

Charity concert puts toilet on stage so singers won't have to leave. And they signed a contract for this? Someone out there doesn't care much about charity, do they?

A $1000 lottery ticket is confiscated because it was bought with drug money, but the guy who violated his probation by buying a $1 million lottery ticket gets to keep most of the money. He just has to pay the supervisory fee that was waived. Seems fair.

A man named Martin Luther King Jr. sings the blues. Well, not literally. He's a graphics designer and author of children's books, with such titles as "Frumble the Wumpus has a Dream".

The founder of "No Guns" pleads "No contest" to gun charges. No Guns... except the ones we sell and modify.

Congressional candidate's literature uses a fake photo to make him look skinnier. Maybe he needs it, if he was really the mayor of Sugar Land.

Utah students complain about TV programming and sexy aerobic dancing at Gold's Gym. Doesn't the Bible say they're supposed to pluck their own eyes out in that situation? And that's in BOTH Testaments. Besides, if R-rated programming is their worst complaint, they should read the archives of bad_service and thank their lucky stars (or the god of their golden tablets) that it isn't worse.

Stephen Colbert's portrait hangs - briefly - in the Hall of Presidents, right between the bathrooms. Once Hillary's elected, her portrait will replace it. But Stephen's as funny as ever: "'I don't mean to brag, but as it contains three portraits, my portrait has more portraits than any other portrait in the National Portrait Gallery,' he said, adding, 'All Employees must wash hands before returning to work.'"

Green Bay fan shreds his NFC championship game ticket. Fortunately, it was purchased with a credit card, the seats were in a special handicapped section, and he had the other three tickets from the same order as well as the shredded strips of the ticket to prove his story.

Go Daddy can't use the word "beaver" in a Super Bowl ad. Not even to refer to the animal, in an innuendo-laden way.

Texas mayor fakes the death of a neighbor's shih tzu. Worse, her latest campaign pamphlets superimposed her head on a slimmer body.

Woman locked in Estonian opera house bathroom overnight. When planning to use a public restroom after hours, always have an emergency kit handy.

WSU student arrested for two marijuana charges on the same night. "I couldn't have been smoking pot that night, Your Honor. I was under arrest for smoking pot."

Man steals Taser from police car, then has fake Taser fight with his father and puts the video on YouTube. DON'T POST VIDEO OF YOURSELF WITH STOLEN STUFF ON YOUTUBE. That's as stupid as getting arrested, then doing the very same thing again. Word on whether they plan to sue the Chinese subway is pending.

New Jersey company tracks down $469,000 it paid to a man in Illinois who never worked for them. He might have been able to pass it off as ignorance had he not drawn $1900 from the attached retirement account.

Man flees police but leaves 2-year-old son behind. It was just a traffic stop, too. I've had those... you hand over your I.D., pay the ticket eventually, and it's done. Not so easy if you have 75 prior tickets, including a DWI.

Thieves, one of whom shot the other in the but-tocks, make off with a lot of bread - in roll form.

Comments

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jakeexperience
Jan. 22nd, 2008 07:40 pm (UTC)
>Utah students complain about TV programming and sexy aerobic dancing at Gold's Gym. Doesn't the Bible say they're supposed to pluck their own eyes out in that situation? And that's in BOTH Testaments.

During my break period at my weekend job, the company lunch room was showing Final Destination 2 on a monitor and I got to chuckle at some of the gory deaths (man, I love the pileup at the start of the film).


>Another article on Internet plagiarism. Honestly, I see so many of these that I begin to think they're just cutting and pasting from other articles.


I LOL'd.
nidoking
Jan. 22nd, 2008 09:42 pm (UTC)
The funniest part about Final Destination 2 (and possibly 3... I don't think I ever paid enough attention to determine whether this is true or not) is that they've made a big deal about the "correct order" of deaths throughout the series, but if you take notes, you'll notice that the deaths in real time are in exactly the opposite order from the ones in the vision at the beginning of the movie.

I don't consider the first one useful at all in that regard, because the "order" was determined by tracing an electric cable to determine the path of an explosion that blew up a plane. Way too arbitrary.
jakeexperience
Jan. 22nd, 2008 09:45 pm (UTC)
In FD 2, her attempt to intervene caused the order to invert. And it was possible in that one to transfer the death over to someone else through interacting with them.

FD 3 was just bad. Not even so bad it's good bad.
nidoking
Jan. 22nd, 2008 10:00 pm (UTC)
... if they'd said anything remotely like that at any time during the series, I might say that's acceptable. But not only is that not what she said, it contradicts the entire premise of the series: that Death has a plan, which will happen no matter what anyone does. Even the notion of "transferring" a death doesn't prevent the original death... it just means that if someone was saved by someone who was supposed to be dead already, that person will also die in a seemingly random accident.

Note that, in the end, NONE of the "survivors" escaped death. The survivors from the second movie died in a random accident, as evidenced by the print on the newspaper in the subway in the third movie... if you trust the DVD extras zoomed-in version.
jakeexperience
Jan. 22nd, 2008 10:11 pm (UTC)
Hmm ... I'm sad to hear the remainder of the kids from the second movie bought it, as I kind of liked them.
jakeexperience
Jan. 22nd, 2008 10:12 pm (UTC)
However, that info makes me dislike the 3rd one even more, so perhaps that is a good thing (?)
wing_zero_ew
Jan. 22nd, 2008 10:12 pm (UTC)
Poor wittle Mormon students. Oh if only we let them establish Utah as a theocracy again, then perhaps they could shield themselves from the evils of consensual adult sex, caffeine and alcohol!

As opposed to a life of child brides, desert communes and murderous patriarchy. HOW DID THINGS EVER GO SO WRONG?
wing_zero_ew
Jan. 22nd, 2008 10:15 pm (UTC)
The No Guns thing was a pretty clever scam, by the sound of it. Take your status as a 'former' gang member to get 'street cred', then hoodwink the city into giving you a big grant to fight gang violence, which you actually use to funnel guns to your gang of choice.

jadestar4
Jan. 23rd, 2008 04:13 am (UTC)
I wish these fucking idiots in Utah would just suck it up and get over their own self righteous ways. It makes our whole state look like a bunch of pussy hypocrites.
nidoking
Jan. 23rd, 2008 11:04 am (UTC)
Well, not the WHOLE state... just the people in it. :P

But at least I know there's one sensible person in Utah.
( (void *) comments[10] — Finger the nothingness that underlies everything )

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Yes, I'm THAT Nidoking. Sometimes I write fanfiction... often I waste all my time playing video games and watching anime. But it's not a waste if I enjoy it, right? I can quote from a movie, video game, anime series, or British comedy apropos of just about any situation, and one of my main goals in life is to entertain people. (The other big one is amassing as much anime and manga as I can... see below for a progress report.) That's me in a nutshell. ("Help! I'm trapped in a nutshell! What a bloody great nutshell this is!")

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