A. If there are good directions on the box.
Q. What was your dream growing up?
A. I usually dreamed about aliens, people who didn't really exist, and later, video games.
Q. What talent do you wish you had?
A. I wish I could get past the part of God of War 2 where I'm stuck. But it would be really nice to be able to draw. Or make computer art. Or do anything with graphics that doesn't look like "The Blob" only with less form.
Q. If I bought you a drink what would it be?
A. How should I know? You bought it!
Q. Favorite vegetable?
A. Probably carrots, although celery goes well with dips. So does broccoli. I'm also a fan of Broccoli, but they're different.
Q. What was the last book you read?
A. The last novel was the last Harry Potter book, but I recently finished Pichi Pichi Pitch book 6.
Q. What zodiac sign are you ?
A. I'm not a Zodiac sign... I'm a human being! Besides, I have no idea whether it's Capricorn, Aquarius, or right on the border. Anyone got a star chart, my birth records, and a sextant?
Q. Any Tattoos and/or Piercings?
A. Not intentional ones.
Q. Worst Habit?
A. I don't wear nun clothing, sorry.
Q. If you saw me walking down the street would you offer me a ride?
A. Where the heck are you walking to in Bloomington?
Q. What is your favorite sport?
A. Badminton. The ONLY sport.
Q. Pessimistic or Optimistic attitude?
A. Depends on the situation. The better things are going for me, the more pessimistic I become.
Q. What would you do if you were stuck in an elevator with me?
A. Hit the Emergency Call button and wait to be rescued, same as you.
Q. Worst thing to ever happen to you?
A. I was born. That wasn't really bad in and of itself, but it seems to have been a direct contributor to all the misery I've suffered since.
Q. Tell me one weird fact about you:
A. That's not a question.
Q. Do you have any pets?
A. Not on me.
Q. What if I showed up at your house unexpectedly?
A. I'm probably not even there. You need to plan these things better, and call ahead next time.
Q. What was your first impression of me?
A. "Great, now she thinks I'm a complete jerk. Thanks for the introduction, bardoftoday.
Q. Do you think clowns are scary?
A. That depends. When they're being hit in the face with pies, no. When they're attacking me with chainsaws, somewhat. When they're running for political office, very.
Q. If you could change one thing about how you look, what would it be?
A. I'd like to be invisible. There would be definite advantages to being invisible.
Q. Would you be my crime partner or my conscience?
A. You're a criminal? I'm going to be MY conscience and turn you in. Are you going to confess?
Q. What color eyes do you have?
A. *squints* Sorry... can't see them. I think they're mostly white, though.
Q. Ever been arrested?
A. Nope. Probably came close, though.
Q. Bottle or Draft?
A. I'm firmly against the draft... military service loses its distinction if it's not voluntary.
Q. If you won $10,000 dollars today, what would you do with it?
A. Probably apply it directly to my mortgage. It's a good investment.
Q. Would you date me?
A. Would you divorce Chris first? If so, then I don't think I can trust your willingness to commit.
Q. What's your favorite place to hang out at?
A. My room. It's where I spend the most time, aside from work or my car.
Q. Do you believe in ghosts?
A. No, but I doubt they'd care.
Q. Favorite thing to do in your spare time?
A. Play video games. Although, in many ways, I hardly consider that "spare" time because I take it seriously.
Q. Do you swear a lot?
A. What the fuck? Fuck no! Absolutely no fucking way. That's bullshit.
Q. Biggest pet peeve?
A. People who swear all the time. Fucking bastards.
Q. In one word, how would you describe yourself?
Q. Middle Name?
A. No thanks, I've already got one. Of course, since it's Paul, I wouldn't mind trading it in for a new one. What have you got?
Today's Bridge: Surprise! I got an ace. The other Matt got today's king. We still won, I believe, by virtue of amassing a game and protecting it viciously. I left Kelly in 1S with five spades to an honor, a singleton diamond, and 11 points, because we had 80 below, and if we had slam prospects, she'd have opened 2C. Indeed, we made 6 only because Keith didn't cash one of his red aces... had we been in 6S, it would have been the natural play.
Today's Work: I finally got to take a look at the project I haven't done anything for the rest of the week, and it's big. I'm sure the changes are simple to moderate, but I have to find them, and that's not going to be easy. I don't even know quite how the parts of the system fit together. We also may have BIG problems with an upcoming delivery... but I think it's just a driver problem that will be fixed when we build the system up from scratch. I sure hope so. The alternatives aren't pretty.
Today's Golf: I golf well. No major screwups today, and I even managed -11 on the front 9 of Pink Wind with no successful item use... I may have tried a Lucky Pangya, but if I did, it failed.
I meant to describe a story idea yesterday and never got around to it. Might as well go for it, since I've been kicking it around for ages, and I'm proud of it, even if I never did solidify many details. It's about a guy rather like me (computer programmer, fan of manga, living on his own) who gets a new credit card that, unbeknownst to him, has an amazing property: Whenever he uses that card to buy manga, the main character comes to life in the real world, as if they've always been there. One of his first purchases is a title called "Manga Collector Anako", about a girl who loves all things manga, and after smacking him into a wall for accidentally touching her in the wrong place (anime convention meets real-world physics - a recurring theme) and putting him in the hospital, she starts hanging out with him all the time, enjoying the situations that arise around him as well as his manga collection. He loses his job and has to find a roommate, but doesn't have any luck until he buys "Tonari Devil", a series about a guy whose next door neighbor is the incarnation of evil. Should be obvious who offers to be his roommate. Other stories include "Devil Wing", about a guy whose body is half-possessed by a demon that's awakened by the screeching sound of other demons entering his world, and can only be sated with a blood sacrifice - and the hero has to make sure it's the newly-arrived demon rather than an innocent human who's killed; and as a punchline while he's in the hospital, realizing that his manga purchases have come to life, "City Destroyer Gon", in which a giant dinosaur can't avoid smashing cities although he really doesn't want to hurt anyone. I figure a plot will eventually develop where the roommate (probably teamed with some other characters) tries to enact some sort of evil plan, and the hero has to strategically buy series featuring heroes who will help him save the world, and possibly even grant him power of his own. Granted, it's kind of contrived and cliché, but I think I could take it in an original direction. And the comic relief would be pretty good. Comments?