Government officials burn down their building with a trash fire. I guess someone didn't attend the mandatory safety meeting that month.
Man shoots at armed brothers. Absolutely brilliant. "Hey, those guys can shoot back! Let's lock and load!"
Fireman survives being hit in the head with a hot steel rod. They just call it a "hot rod" in the headline... I don't think Kevlar would protect him if a car had been thrown at his head.
Vandals destroy a Hummer because it's not eco-friendly enough. Hard to tell whom to sympathize with here. I mean, it's his purchasing decision, but buying a Hummer in a neighborhood of Prius owners... you're asking for it.
Manure company dumps a truckload on Amanda Sorvino's driveway because her father stopped a check. What is this, the Poop Mafia?
Boy buys a PS2 on eBay and gets 65,400 euros ($1,000,000,000,000,000,000.65 American). I bet the boy's pissed he didn't get the games he ordered.
Firefighters practice their destructive skills on the wrong house. The owners naturally want to be compensated for their loss, but given that a fire crew destroyed it, is it considered fire damage?
And finally, in the story you all knew was coming, a couple will get married tomorrow night, then go straight to the bookstore to get the first copy of the final Harry Potter book off the line. They're even postponing the honeymoon for a week so the bride can read the book. I expect the groom's hoping for some saucy Ron/Hermione action they can roleplay, but he's probably already got a pre-nup stating that if she calls him "Sirius" mid-coitus, he gets an automatic annulment.