Nidoking: What's bad luck to most people is my way of life.
Friend: Don't kick yourself too much over it.
Nidoking: Are you kidding? That, in a more serious way, is my way of life.
Nidoking: I kick myself over the little things because there ARE no big things.
Nidoking: The big things, I completely ignore. They're somebody else's problem.
Nidoking: My great-grandmom died about a year ago. Her daughter joined her a few months ago. Do you see ME moping about it in the channel?
Nidoking: I suppose I'd be rather upset if my mom died. I'd have to arrange to get back home for the funeral and all. But death isn't something I get emotional about.
Nidoking: I figure, if the biggest thing I have to worry about is "bad luck", then maybe my life isn't so bad.
So it became a hypothetical question: would I get upset over a death in my close family? Well, the question isn't quite so hypothetical anymore. My oldest brother is in the emergency room now for what might very well be appendicitis. I swear it runs in my family, and it's impossible to diagnose because the pain is on the wrong side. It's nothing that would kill him, we can only hope, but it's still serious business. And he's going to be missing a lot of class, when he's overloading quite a bit just to finish his curriculum in the four years of college. And still, my only thought is making sure we have a contingency plan in place in case he can't make the trip home for Christmas in two weeks. Compare that to last night, when I was devastated because I'd entered the fanfic channel during a eulogy - a "virtual wake" in the words of the friend mentioned above - and said some stuff about fanfiction. That's what I was referring to in the conversation quoted above. But the answer to the hypothetical question is most likely no. There are plenty of other people to get upset over big stuff like that. They don't need my cheap emotional sentiment. I can help the most by being rational and taking the best course of action. Nobody but me gets upset over putting my foot in my mouth, so I get irrationally emotional over that.
Today's Spades: A horrific loss for our team. We missed a 10 bid that mostly arose due to a nil and a crossruff for our side - Paul opened 1 with three spades and less than 6 points. I had four spades and ten points or so, so I couldn't justifiably go higher than 6. We made 10, setting their 6 by quite a few tricks. Then I completely screwed up a 7 bid by giving Paul a ruff instead of leading the queen of spades for a finesse (or a massive fall of honors), giving the opponents the king of spades. Then the opponents made a 10 over my nil, and I tried to take every trick I could, but no luck. We were so far behind that after Dan bid 4, I bid nil, and the other Paul (not my partner) also went nil, Paul went 10. It was a tough call, but he had 6 spades to honors minus the ace and runnable clubs. Dan had 5 spades, though, and the other Paul and I had one each. So he was off by one, and dumped every club in his hand to double their contract, while both nils held. Had we made that and the 7 I screwed up, we'd still have lost, but not by nearly as much. Something like 159 to 565.
The guy who's testing my code didn't come in today, so I was stuck mostly spinning my gears... I made changes to another part of the project, but I don't have enough equipment available to test the changes. So who knows what problems will arise after having made so many changes, and whether I'll be able to isolate the problems to one particular change? But that's the way it has to be done...
I wrote most of the rest of the chapter tonight... and finished up the climax. All that's left is the aftermath and a bit of wind-down as we move into the sidestory. This part isn't particularly exciting, but it may well reveal quite a bit about what's happening.
Sailor Moon gasped at the sound, coughing almost immediately. It was Sailor Pluto's voice! "Sai-"
"Don't try to speak!" warned Sailor Pluto. "I'm only pretending to be unconscious. I'm speaking directly into your mind so that Cell can't hear me. Please, listen carefully. This is the only chance we have to set the timeline right. I must tell you something that you won't like to hear, but I must explain myself quickly.
"It is written that you will defeat Beryl by merging your power with that of the other Sailor Scouts - and that they must sacrifice their lives to bring that about. Don't say anything!" she snapped, as Sailor Moon was about to do just that. "It is history, and that must not change. The universe depends on it!
"The Sailor Scouts have already sacrificed their lives by becoming part of Cell. There is only one way to turn that sacrifice into a victory now. You must lure Cell into the Negaverse, where he will use that power to defeat Queen Beryl in your stead. It is not exactly according to history, but it will have to be close enough. It is the only way that the rightful timeline can be restored. Do not worry... you and the other Scouts will be resurrected once Beryl is dead. I will see to it.
"I'm using the last of my power to open the portal beside you. Summon whatever strength you can and get through it. Once you're on the far side, I'll return to the Gate of Time, where Cell can't reach me. He'll have to follow you, and the portal will close behind him."
Sound reasonable to anyone? Hokey? Reasonably hokey? Garbage? Brilliance? I'll take any feedback I can get on this idea. It's not exactly integral to the plot... I could cut it out and not lose any of the story. But it's a detail that rounds out the plot nicely, so I like it. Also, I came up with it a long time ago and was looking for a reasonable way to incorporate it into the story. I doubt I'll have the chapter finished tomorrow, but probably by the end of the week. The rest just needs to be as concise as possible, now that I've hit the climax, but there's still quite a bit left to do. Wish me luck, if you'd like.
Always look both ways before doing anything. Crossing the street is only one example. Walking into hallways is another. Also drinking from a water fountain, going to the bathroom, jumping from a high place... be creative. Use your imagination. But look both ways first.