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Dude! It's news!

Takeru Kobayashi won the eating contest. No surprises there.

A town's entire fireworks display is stolen. With one town not reporting in, the country fails to be one year older.

It's hurricane betting season. I think it's wrong for a completely different reason than everyone else does. I just plain don't respect gambling. Hurricanes are a fact of life and a force of nature... why would betting on them be any different from any other bet? Honestly?

An attempt to appeal to Hispanic customers by putting jalapeños in ice cream has yielded Cold Sweat ice cream, the ice cream so hot you have to sign a waiver to eat it. But really... what kind of moron does it take to think that Hispanics want jalapeños in their ice cream? They FRY it.

A driver caught speeding moves a speed limit sign to try to argue against the ticket. It's hard to find anything to say that'll make his stupidity any clearer. Oh, right... he took a photograph of it.

Thieves ruin the honor system for old golf ball purchases for everyone once again. He should have written "good luck" on one of the bills.

A drunk driver steals the police car and drives it into a river. Why are the police not doing anything about this? Or perhaps just not doing enough. Procedures, people! Procedures!

A kitten survives a trip through a wood chipper. That should help him get adopted.

Oops, a monkey, escapes from a zoo. No, I didn't punctuate that incorrectly. Punckshulation? is& fun!$%

Comments

thrives
Jul. 5th, 2006 04:54 pm (UTC)
Hahaha I get it her name is Oops.

I like news. :D And macaques.
nidoking
Jul. 5th, 2006 05:05 pm (UTC)
I think there was a Wild Thornberries episode with macaques. The long-tails and the short-tails were fighting.

And you didn't give me a random subject to write about in this old post. They're fun.
thrives
Jul. 5th, 2006 05:07 pm (UTC)
Ohgod, Wild Thornberries. o_o

And I'm not giving you a subject because the only ones that come to mind are evil :9
nidoking
Jul. 5th, 2006 05:55 pm (UTC)
You think I'm scared of an evil subject?
thrives
Jul. 5th, 2006 05:58 pm (UTC)
WITH THE ONES MY BRAIN COMES UP WITH, YES.
nidoking
Jul. 5th, 2006 06:33 pm (UTC)
Don't feel you have to hold back for my sake. I welcome challenges. Remember, all I have to do is use the subject in a relevant fashion... if you've seen what I did with Meep and Cheese, you can probably guess how I'll handle whatever you can come up with.

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Yes, I'm THAT Nidoking. Sometimes I write fanfiction... often I waste all my time playing video games and watching anime. But it's not a waste if I enjoy it, right? I can quote from a movie, video game, anime series, or British comedy apropos of just about any situation, and one of my main goals in life is to entertain people. (The other big one is amassing as much anime and manga as I can... see below for a progress report.) That's me in a nutshell. ("Help! I'm trapped in a nutshell! What a bloody great nutshell this is!")

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