A charity suggests a romantic llama ride for Valentine's Day. Be sure not to bring acetylene balloons.
A child model show. Awwww... the little girl wants to grow up to be God. Don't worry... you've probably got a few more years before you're old enough to be brutally smitten for your hubris. You might even be able to read the Incarnations of Immortality series by then.
CPR saves a chicken in Arkadelphia. Arkadelphia... the city of brother-and-sisterly love? *ducks* No, seriously, I've got great friends in Arkansas. Love you guys.
I can't improve on this headline... "Teen Using Restroom Falls Out Bus Window".
The Lost Library Book of
11-year-old burglar is off to an early start. Why, kid, why? You could have been a fashion model at your age!