Nidoking (nidoking) wrote,

News we never thought you'd see

I discovered that, while direct links to Reuters have been failing and tinyurl links don't seem to work for me, I can go straight to the Reuters home page and look up the articles from there. So if the Reuters links give you errors and you want to read the stories, that's the way to go. They're all under Oddly Enough.

A baby panda has been named. What makes this interesting is that there's a picture of the baby panda. Picture. Go. Look. Squee if necessary.

A Nova Scotia widow hides her husband's tombstone to prevent it from being repossessed. Oh, poor foolish woman. You fell into the trap of the death industry and are blinded by your fear and devotion and inability to let go. They're not going to be on your side. They're going to throw the book at you. Next time, make sure you can take care of yourself before buying a headstone you can't afford. Also, don't buy a headstone you can't afford.

Mattel fights in Canadian Supreme Court to protect its trademark from Barbie's restaurant and bar. Their next target is the Australian dialect, where they will be trying to strike the phrase "throw a shrimp on the barbie" from the language, as it may have adult connotations. Also in Canadian court, we find the city of Victoria challenging the nomination of "Mr. Floatie", the environmental mascot, for the mayoral election. That would be like Mr. Hanky becoming the mayor of South Park, except Mr. Hanky could probably win because he's not just a guy in a suit. So maybe more like Mr. Hat. (In South Park, that could happen too.)

A British police dog has been given early retirement for being lazy. I'm surprised more of them don't think of that.

A man drives into a Burger King, then parks his car and goes in to order. He tried to turn it into a drive-th*GRK!* (as I am viciously strangulated by the collective membership of customers_suck)

A second grade class on a field trip to a museum got to see more than art... one of the students brought his uncle's stash of pot along to show off. The kid's not going to be charged because authorities don't think he meant any harm. His uncle... not so fortunate.

Guess who protested the Choking Chicken toy. No, it's not the morality and innuendo police... this toy was marketed in Australia. It's the RSPCA. But a good first guess.

Man reports his car missing, but doesn't mention that his son was in it at the time. My guess is that he left it somewhere, wide open, hoping that someone would take (or rescue) the baby and he'd get back just the car. But that's only a guess.

armed robbers hold up a pharmacy and steal a woman's purse along with the loot, but return the purse when the woman pleads with them. She says it's all the money she has to buy her medicine. Robbers with a heart? Surely not!

Maybe someone didn't like the way a murder trial was going, because the defense lawyer's wife was murdered and the whole thing was written off as a mistrial. Sounds like a Monk plot to me.

Bulgarian border police are fired for stealing a U.S. ambassador's phone. They forgot about the embedded tracking device, the idiots.

An Indian man spent over fifty years in an asylum, where he had been locked up for epilepsy. Oops.

Remember I mentioned some time ago that the U.S. was turning away foreign aid after Hurricane Katrina? Well, they're looking to pass on hundreds of thousands of donated MREs to other needy countries because we fear the mad cow disease. But Mad Cow Disease is apparently just fine for other starving countries. Why ask for foreign food donations if you can't use them? Bah.

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