November 8th, 2006

Moa: The King of Destruction

Brahms' First News

The election has certainly changed one thing about this country: Everyone who's been saying "Voting is your civic duty" is now saying "I hope you all voted." I hear that President Bush is planning to make a speech about the results of the election, and I figure it will probably go something like "I'm ashamed of this country for not listening to me when I told you how to vote. I thought I made it perfectly clear that you were supposed to vote REPUBLICAN! But in this time of crisis for our country, we all have to work together and try to get back on track when the two years of darkness are over. We're all going to have to combinate our forces and work together for the common and good. I put my trust in the Democrats to keep our troops in Iraq as long as it takes to win this war, and to keep vital pieces of legislation like the Patriot Act in place so I can continue to personally defend this country. I promise I won't read any of your personal mail. That doesn't include you, Mark Foley. Pause for laughter. Oh, wait, I wasn't supposed to read that part."

Bibles in pocket save a man from being shot. You know what we need to do... Everyone strap a bunch of Qurans over your vital organs and go get shot at, before everyone buys into the bullet-stopping properties of the Bible!

Couples who are having trouble making babies can go on luxury vacations to learn the secrets of sexcess. Here's the essence of it... you have to put the ding-dong in the hoohah and waggle it around until it goes whoopee.

Drunk drivers try to buy gas from a nuclear power plant. If either of them had been driving a DeLorean, it might have worked.

Man chokes a car wash supervisor because they washed his tires by hand. And the story was written by Steve Schmadeke. That's a name that just screams made up.

Newspapers charge for letters to the editor that back political candidates. On the one hand, it makes some sense, since it's basically advertising that's cheap as free. On the other hand, why are political opinions any different from other opinions? All I know is, the Jonesboro Sun could make a mint with a scheme like that.

A North Carolina school requires students to be escorted to the bathroom by administrators. A HIGH school. So the hall pass records aren't enough to help them pinpoint the troublemakers who are setting fires? Yeesh! Don't 85% of school shootings happen in the classroom? Student safety... I agree with those kids. They should get recess and naptime.

Doctor drugs male patients and takes compromising photos of them. What eventually did him in was two of them waking up at his house.

New Mexico Burger King employees give police burgers with pot on them. They must have coincidentally said the secret word or placed the magic order. (The code word for this drug purchase is... "burger".)
Moa: The King of Destruction

More philosophy

We still have the Gatorade machine that has no Gatorade for sale. I thought it would be gone long before now, but part of me knew all along that it was here to stay. But that may change. Pepsico finally got around to restocking the entire machine, rather than chunking in a few Mocha Frappuccinos and calling it a day. However, they left the door unlocked. It still can't be opened without the key, but it's not closed tightly enough. So the dispenser doesn't work, the light is out, and I don't think the refrigerator is running. If I really wanted their overpriced drinks, I might be able to force it by holding the door shut while I completed my transaction, but it's more fun to think of their tech getting here whenever he does and seeing that nobody bought anything because they couldn't. I want to see how long it takes before someone closes that door properly. My bet's on two weeks. We're going on three days now, at least... I think it was refilled on Friday. And I'm never there to see it.

I'll make this official when I can be bothered, but I want to put the Destroy All Humans games on my Christmas list. I'll need to look up the system info and see if the XBox version will run on a 360.
Moa: The King of Destruction

(no subject)

Today's Bridge: We only had four, so I was spared. Steve took a big risk in the final hand and got us set three tricks doubled vulnerable, which is why I may have to remind him of what "vulnerable" means. Fortunately, thanks to my not being content to settle for less than slam on the previous hand, even though we only needed 20 points, we had a slam bonus as well as a game bonus to offset the loss.

Today's Ookami: I fired it up for the first time, because Fox has apparently decided to pull The Rich List after only one episode... they don't usually pre-empt shows that they plan to keep for crap like The O.C. That's how Wonderfalls died, and Tru Calling (its rival for the timeslot) went the same way one year later. As for the game, it didn't play nice with my 32 MB memory card and erased my Mamodo Fury progress. Good thing I hadn't accomplished much yet. It may have erased something else (there were two corrupted blocks of data, one of which was a few files back... fortunately, both were deletable), but I didn't notice anything obvious that was missing, and it would have to be a game I played recently. My guess is that Ookami made a corrupt block, and the most recent file added to the card (Mamodo Fury) also got corrupted. No biggie - that's why I've got 8 MB cards. Once that was settled, I accomplished a few things in the first town and started to get used to the battle system and some of the fringe benefits like building up attributes with Praise and filling up the food bag. I even found a few seeds, which offer some sort of reward if I can find them all. There's a helpful guide to show me what areas they're all in. It's a fun game, if the camera's a bit annoying at first (at least it lets me invert either axis, or both), and the drawing interface is easy enough to use. The dialog has its good points, but the "voices" that go with it are annoying, and there doesn't seem to be a way to turn them off or fast-forward through them in some cases. Ugh.

Did I mention that I finished the DearS manga the other day? I probably did. I'm also one book away from finishing Hot Gimmick. Seems like it's almost time to find something new to read. Good thing I've got plenty left. I want to tackle the rest of Tsubasa and Negima soon, but I have a feeling I'm going to read a bunch of first books.

I was really tired last night, possibly because of drinking a Coke, so I turned in after only half of the Mezzo episode. As a reward for my haste, I slept in through at least one alarm, and I may or may not have heard the first one. I was sick and tired all morning. Early to bed my ass. Au contraire, Franklin. Hate to rain on your key-laden kite, but as it happens, au contraire. Au contraire, mon frère.