January 30th, 2006

Moa: The King of Destruction

No, we do have some news

We've seen dogs turn on electric stoves and burn down buildings, but iguanas can turn on taps and flood them. Could be useful after the dog starts the fire, but it's a real nuisance otherwise. I don't know whether this is something that should worry cutest_sandgirl and her geckos or not. They're both reptiles, but I gather that geckos are smaller and mostly interested in cheap car insurance.

A baby girl is rescued from a plastic bag floating on a lake in Brazil. Reports say that the mother, or the homeless people she claimed to have given the baby to, packed her with a wooden board that kept her afloat. They probably just put it in there so she'd have something to play with.

Members of the famous 82nd Airborne Division are said to have appeared on a gay porn website. This is apparently problematic, because while in the military, people are allowed to be gay only as long as they don't ACT gay. So I guess a pair of rainbow pants and a big smile are all that's needed to get a discharge if you're drafted. Possibly useful information.

Fake braces are a new fashion in Thailand. I can't even begin to comprehend it. I was concerned about being made fun of way back when I first got my glasses!

Florida dad punches the teacher's aide who was accused of inappropriately touching his daughter. Yes, you have to protect your daughter. Being stuck in jail while she's out there in a dangerous world seems like a reasonable way to do that until you stop being a moron and think about it.

The Italian premier swears off sex until elections. Apparently, this is a vote-gaining measure of some kind. The reality is that he knows he can't get any and figures he may as well make something out of it. His wife probably said she's holding out on him until he gets re-elected.

Washington, PA will be known as Steeler, PA all week. I think it's a hockey thing or something. The Post Office doesn't recognize the name change, but we don't know why. After all, the state doesn't have any problem with this guy signing his name "God".

Yale University finally supplies soap for its students. In a quid pro quo, students agree to use it.

Zimbabwean twins, arrested for wearing skimpy loincloths in public, show up to court wearing the same thing.

A bounty hunter, searching for a woman who left an old address, breaks into a police officer's home. It's a tough life full of jazz riffs.

A bloodmobile driver is charged with drunk driving. Fortunately, she had plenty of samples to bypass the BAC test.
Moa: The King of Destruction

(no subject)

Strangely, this was one of those days where nothing really happened. The movers showed up unexpectedly right before lunch, so we had to call our project sponsor to cart away our radios post haste, which meant that I played Fluxx with Todd instead of Bridge. The other Matt returned to start his packing, and Jeff's computer's KDE settings needed to be reset. I let Jeff listen to some Dane Cook and let Noah borrow the latest Ranma book, and all I really did for my own move was throw away a bunch of paper clips and carry my papers to my desk. I got home to find my latest paycheck stub, and to my surprise, I'm actually making just slightly more after deductions than I did last year, even with the health insurance payments. Whenever I get the information to claim my benefits, I'll be quite happy. It should probably arrive sometime this week. I made some suspicious chicken teriyaki with chop suey vegetables, and there's something I don't quite like about the way it turned out, aside from the gas pains (which surfaced during the Simpsons episode where Homer has a heart attack and gets a triple bypass... not the best timing), and played too much DQ8, but I finally found that I was supposed to go exactly where I thought I was supposed to go, and I have no idea why I didn't see anything there the first time I went. I had to fight a boss that seemed much tougher than it probably should have been, then went into a dungeon full of large groups of nasty monsters, while Jessica still reflects most of the Heal spells I cast on her like she really wants to die. In that, she Hyatts as much as she Yakumos. "Defensive boost? Healing? No, I want to struggle on with my 19 remaining HP a few more turns! This pained expression on my face is really my way of showing I enjoy it! Cor blimey!" I really wanted to get all of the treasures in that dungeon before exiting, and now I have another urn of saint's ashes. So I can choose to purify a cursed item or make a new spear that I doubt I'll ever use, because spears are the aspect of the hero's skills I've been neglecting. (Everyone's got one plus Fisticuffs... Jessica and Angelo have little skill in staves, Yangus can't do anything special with a club, and the hero only has a few limited spear skills and crappy spears.) I finally raised Jessica to the highest level of Sex Appeal, and while the final ability was far less useful than I was hoping, it gives her something potentially productive to do in battle. I forget whether the mini-medals I have are enough to claim my next reward or not, and it's a pretty long trek to check my total. But that may be a better project for tomorrow than trying to reach the boss, because I really do need to watch Book of Daniel sometime this week.

Speaking of watching, there's nothing quite like being able to curl up at night with an episode of Slayers on the actual TV screen. Getting those stereo speakers was worth it just for that.