Here's one I saw yesterday: "You want to turn yourself in for the crime you're wanted for? Nah, we're too busy... come back tomorrow. We trust you. It's not like you're a criminal or somethi- wait, don't let him get away!" Sometimes, even the cops are idiots.
Good thing this guy likes peanuts. He just had a whole truckload of them dumped in his yard. His comment? "I love peanuts, but I do wish these were from Virginia." Wiseacre. And while nuts were merely the result of that accident, they can cause accidents, too. Pecans stashed by rats block the throttle open... even more sophisticated than the tomfoolery in Final Destination 2.
This Norwegian burning an envelope full of money might be funnier if Red Dwarf hadn't done the same thing in the episode "Marooned". Although they burned the trunkload of money on purpose.
Even animals can figure out what a free all-you-can-eat buffet means: bring a friend.
There's something even more deadly in public schools than pastries now: cartwheels.
And I won't bother to give this last one a cute quip, as I'm just including it because I know it'll be of interest to at least one person who reads my journal. This is a neat article for CSI fans.
Looks like my work this week has paid off... my form is doing everything I wanted it to do, and some stuff I didn't anticipate it being able to do. It's pretty nifty.