College students die, probably from inhaling helium. It was funny when Lloyd Bridges did it... not so funny in real life.

This kid's mom will never ask him to do the cooking and laundry again - he blew up the house.

A Japanese ice cream place at a theme park serves stranger flavors than Bertie Bott's Beans. And am I right in thinking that Namjatown is owned by Namco, the video game company that made everything from the classic arcade games like Pac-Man and Frogger to Tales of Destiny? And that "Sunshine City" as a name is the most devious tongue twister ever?

British soccer fans watching the World Cup online cost their economy 5.8 billion euros (119 quadrillion dollars). There need to be stricter rules against doing things other than work at work!

A burglar, locked in the store he was trying to rob, lights a cigarette and waits to be arrested. Yes, the cigarettes were stolen.

While religious nuts everywhere live in fear of tomorrow, they're celebrating it in Hell, Michigan. The rest of us know that the apocalypse came and went on Thursday, the first.

Everyone already knows about the snake on a plane, so I won't mention it.

A divorced couple in Spain engage in court proceedings over visitation rights for the dog. That's not so funny as the judge saying the man's demands are "pie in the sky". What the Hell, Michigan does that mean?

A teen arrested for leaving the scene of an accident steals the squad car and crashes it, then leaves the scene of the accident. Some kids never learn.

Man tries to use a potato as a gun silencer. Shame he didn't try to shoot it - the gene pool could use some more disinfecting.

A real-life shoe camera fetishist in California. And by that, I mean he was using his shoe camera to take upskirt shots, not that he had a fetish for shoe cameras. That would be really weird.

A woman is fined $137.50 for throwing lettuce out of her car. At that fine, I thought it was a head of lettuce maliciously thrown at someone ("It's a drive-by fruiting!"), but it was just leftover lettuce from a McDonald's salad. I think she suffered because she didn't show up in court.

An Austrian tax collector loses $28,000 in a restaurant bathroom. As if whoever took tax money is going to return it.

High school students fill their school with baby birds. Baby birds fill the school with what they used to be filled with. The school fills the gym with students and sends them home until they can clean up the mess. So why was a school still in session anyway?

China cracks down on college exam cheaters by bringing in the police and jamming cell phones. It's not like they're allowed to get to any useful resources on the Internet anymore.